Ruined by Love

It comes on me suddenly at random times... this overwhelming sense of love that leaves me weeping and crying out the name of Jesus. It happened yesterday at lunch and again this morning.

This song was running through my head as I awoke, Death was Arrested, especially the phrase "Oh, your grace so free, washes over me..." 

I feel it, I see Him, He is walking with me... all the time... I see Him at church, at work, in my friends and my family. He comes in the night and speaks through dreams or songs. He is everywhere! I can't get enough, I want to spend time with Him!

Spending time with Him doesn't always look like I might think. The other night I cried as I was driving home from Mom's. It was much later than I had wished and I really wanted some time with Jesus, but Mom was awake and I sat by her bed, held her hand, sang and prayed and quoted Psalms 23. Then I sat down and helped my sister shell beans and chatted, about important things. So as the tears rolled down Jesus said, "You were spending time with me, Pauline." Spending time with those you love is part of it.

And then there was the time this week when there was something I badly wanted to do and He said no. I couldn't miss the love, when He lifted my chin, looked into my eyes and explained why.

A few months ago a small group of us decided to do a study by Jack Frost called Spiritual Slavery to Spiritual Sonship. It talks about the orphan heart and the importance of being able to receive love. I realized how I have closed my heart to love and since then God has been teaching me how to live with an open heart. There's plenty of love out there. The key is being able to receive it.

If this is what love is, I like it...